Garden of Eden

What I probably need now isn't a post to write on how I feel, but rather someone that I could talk to. Someone who is aware of what I'm thinking about. Someone that can tell me that its okay to hate this and that. And someone to stand by me as I walk away from college. Or maybe I'm a little angry all this while, I don't really know what I'm really angry about anymore.

I didn't cry after primary school was over. Well, I'm still gonna see majority of them in secondary school anyway. I didn't after secondary school either. I didn't think there was any need for that, because I still saw them eventually. Somehow, this time feels different. Marissa is a happy person. Seeing her eyes swell, I sang her the graduation song and told her we would always be friends forever. It was a deliberate attempt to make her cry because she wouldn't. Plainly because she's happy. But I saw those tears. I suddenly found myself at a low point. I feel bad. Like a jerk.

Maybe I'm not expressing my sadness due to my self-denial. And I still tell myself, don't worry. The end is near, but there are still weeks. There is still time, but quickly running out. I hope I could turn back time to spend time with my friends and experience it all over again ( not to gain 30 new friends like Albert -_- ). I wish I could have known them sooner. But I think it is still ok, for I honestly love pe5 =)

I want to gossip with Marissa and tease her about her hair.
I want Choy Koon to accidently blurt out how she looks forward for hard bodies in UK.
I want Ashwin to spill out updates on Laveena and Maxxie.
I want to hear Jin Han tell me how a screwed up no muscle person I am.
I want Nico to say Hi to me.
I want Sukhdave to call me Ogoipees.
I want to listen to Yuk Chang telling me how he enjoyed whoever last night.
I want to hear Rachel go eiyerrr when she finds out she's being left out.
I want Brian to order me to erase the whiteboard.
I want Julian to boast about how good Nadal and Sharapova is.
I want Kevin to make his spelling errors and cheesy lines.
I want to see Ginger box and kick Joven.
I want Hui Sien to tell me how lifeless I am.
I want to find Hui Ann's labcoat and tell her the kakak's threw it.
I want to shakkahou and twitterpate Li Sheen.
I want to catch Alice and her friend together.
I want to boo Yu Ling and scare her.
I want Dimishtra to ask me how am I.
I want Joshua to tell Mrs. Lim off.
I want Silas or Sean to pop out of no where to give me a hug.
I want Wai Kit to drive me around with all his soft toys.

I want to know we will all be fine and will always keep in touch. Friends? Friends we are =)

I came across this pretty interesting post.

The most depressed people are, more often than not, the ones who try to make others laugh. At their expense or not I can’t really decide. But I do know that they do that in order to get themselves infected with laughters. If not, their humour won’t be as wry, quick-witted or insanely weird.

Laugh, if you must. The last thing I need now is not being able to.

True or not, its yourself that decide.